What to do when no one understands you. What is the power of loneliness

Why doesn't anyone understand me when I need support so much? Do many people dislike me and avoid me? What's wrong with me? If you also have similar thoughts, know that you are not alone in experiencing a crisis. Loneliness lives in many people, regardless of their appearance and well-being. How do others like it, but not affect your dignity? What mistakes do we make in our search for mutual understanding? When it is difficult to cope with problems in society, you need to completely reboot yourself. Stay tuned.

Nobody likes me or what is the feeling of indifference?

So you look at yourself in the mirror and see an attractive-looking person who has not yet managed to do much and is full of ambitions... but in reality you feel a broken state from hopelessness. Obsessive thoughts sound in my head: “Why is everyone avoiding me when I want to be heard, I want to tell you what has accumulated in me over the years? What did I do wrong to them?

Everyone is immersed in a society where millions of people interact with each other. Life circumstances force individuals of different personalities to collide, which is why there is a fundamental lack of mutual understanding between them. And it happens that a person has not done anything negative to you, but in your subconscious you do not want to get involved with him and start a relationship. For many, the norm is to say “hello” and “bye” and that’s the end of the conversation.

Why doesn't anyone like me, because I was raised to respect others and be sociable? People often come to a psychotherapist with this question, and he answers them with a smile: “Your answer may lie in childhood or adolescence" An overabundance of parental care often makes a child dependent on help. His self-esteem is not strong enough, and he is shown that everything is being done without his participation.

Lack of attention makes the child’s unformed psyche hostage to resentment and self-isolation. In the future, such people experience problems in socialization, because in both cases the person does not have communication skills or stress resistance. The fear that “they won’t love me, they won’t understand me, I’d better keep silent, I shouldn’t be here” drives the victim into a dead end.

Nobody understands me- this is the syndrome of a forgotten, undervalued person who expects reciprocity from others. It’s nice to say good news, and they pat you on the shoulders and say “well done”, “how did you do it?” It's nice to receive spontaneous calls when you don't expect it and an invitation to a cafe. But if your friends are only in social networks, and your colleagues selfishly drink coffee and discuss your shortcomings, then you need to think about it.

The problem lies in the person himself, because it is better to start with yourself, and not try to change everyone - this will not work and there is no such authority. Psychology is affected by all the shocks that a person has experienced during his adult years. An unsuccessful romance, which turned into a scandal, made the girl hostage to complexes about starting a new relationship. The loss of a loved one completely destroyed dreams and now the person is deeply depressed. Ridicule in childhood turned the child into an egoist, and in adulthood he thinks only of himself. Regardless of what happened to us yesterday, it is important not to let loneliness overcome our hopes for a happy life.

Nobody understands me or why it's hard to be myself

Society is usually divided into social groups, where each participant is associated with himself by profession or connections of interest. In many companies there is a loner who usually stands on the sidelines, he does not take part in the conversation and, in general, he is not even invited. For others, it plays the role of noise, that is, an addition to the integrity of the picture. Such people often play the role of a pawn in the field of other people's interests, which is why they feel used.

But under such circumstances, the “victim” continues to perform his tasks, although he feels bad. Under the pressure of imaginary respect, a person is ready to perform beyond his capabilities, and in a moment of weakness feel complete devastation from loneliness. The lack of energy gives rise to the idea that no one understands me. It is very important to have an exchange between people, and when there is a “single-goal game” you become upset about your fate.

Against the backdrop of melancholy, you cannot allow yourself to fall apart and blame fate for everything. Life teaches important lessons that we must learn if we want to grow to a higher level. It is important to analyze your inner world according to the following scheme:

  • Why doesn't anyone like me? This question encourages you to think about your character, the image that appears to others. Often the problem is a bad character, excessive temper, or a constant state of whining.
  • If no one really loves you, then we ask a counter question - who do you love? It is important to show signs of attention to those who care about you. A person may need a gesture, after which he will understand that it is his turn to go to the meeting. Fear that there will be no reciprocity is the worst thing a single person can do. You should not be afraid to show interest in others.
  • Why is a person avoided or their attitude misunderstood? He may have excessive demands on others, which makes him independent compared to others. Desire to find ideal partner turns into lonely evenings, and the desire to be friends with successful people makes you a hostage to patterns. Expectations do not always correspond to reality, so it is important to look at existing options.
  • How not to be afraid to take action, express thoughts, feel freedom from within? It's all about confidence, or rather the lack thereof. Without this skill, a guy cannot meet a girl, an employee cannot defend his right at work, a pedestrian does not dare to approach and talk to a stranger. The fear “they won’t understand me, I’ll be ridiculous, what they’ll think of me” fetters all attempts. It doesn't matter what others think as long as you sensibly assess your actions and their consequences. P.S. Today, invite someone special to you, a group of people to a café, or give a spontaneous gift to someone you care about. Don't be afraid to take action!
  • The key to all troubles is also negative thinking. Who loves pessimists, from whom you only hear “there’s a war, there’s a price increase, there’s a crisis, and you knew that Christina has become fat and now looks ridiculous. Here are photos of yesterday's accident." Such a character reeks of bad news, complaints, envy and prejudice towards others. It’s easier to go around it by the seventh road and talk with the same Christina, who is the soul of the company.

The thought “nobody understands me” is the first signal to understand yourself better. It is important to see your weaknesses and overcome the usual boundary of your comfort zone. What we consider to be shortcomings may be our strength, but all we need to do is become confident and more responsive. Don’t be afraid to assert yourself, and then others will be able to look at you from a different angle. Was the article useful to you? Share it on social media. networks with friends.

According to my observations, people conflict with each other, first of all, because of a lack of mutual understanding and only then because of a lack of mutual respect. Understanding another person is not as easy as it might seem; you must first want to do it, which not many people want. Basically, everyone tries to explain their position as clearly as possible and only then somehow try to understand someone else’s. At the heart of all this is selfishness, which blinds and deafens us. In general, selfishness is not such a bad trait of a person, in addition to the fact that everyone has this quality, it is a means of survival and therefore it is in no case possible to consider selfishness as something unnecessary. But outright selfishness is more likely to harm than to help; an openly selfish person rushes like a tank, trying to satisfy only his own interests and completely ignoring those of others. It would probably be unnecessary to explain that such people only reach a certain limit, which depends on their capabilities. Therefore, I will not do this, and everything is clear, but rather I will draw your attention to the correct position, which helps to more effectively get what you want in most cases.

All you need is to understand other people, I understand the banality, but it’s true. The only problem is that you don’t know how to do it, you can only guess about it, but if you often have conflicts with other people, you don’t understand them. If I tell you that it would not hurt you, during a dialogue with other people, to put yourself in their place more often, this will of course be a correct statement, but this is not easy to achieve, here you need to have certain mental and psychological characteristics that need to be developed . And therefore, I recommend that you think about what you want from your interlocutor, and what he is not going to give you so easily. If you are solving some issue that is important for both sides, then you do not need to openly demonstrate your position, just be more cunning, beat around the bush, and repeat the position of your interlocutor, clarifying it in this way. Your ego will rush you, forcing you to interrupt your interlocutor to interject your arguments, but do not give in to this temptation. More respect for opposite side, and most importantly, give your interlocutor the opportunity to talk as much as possible, this is important for people.

If you remain silent more and ask questions related to your interlocutor’s speech, you will be amazed at the amount of information he will provide you with. The most important thing you need to achieve in this way is more specifics and details, let your interlocutor understand that you do not fully understand him, but really want to understand. You will be surprised, but forgetting about your position, you will understand someone else’s; it will be as if you are observing the conversation from the outside, and therefore it will seem more objective to you. And in this case it will be possible to choose the most necessary words to competently express your position. Do you agree that there is a difference between observing other people’s communication and one’s own participation in such communication? And if you have noticed this feature, then you understand other people better when you see them from the outside. This happens because you do not focus solely on yourself and your interests, but simply observe, calmly and at ease. So try to be as relaxed and casual in conversation, just listen to the other person and you will hear him. But when you hear it, then you yourself will understand what and how to do, because there are always mutually beneficial interests for any parties, you just need to look for them.

When you know exactly what another person needs, you know how best to give it to him in order to get what is yours. This is a competent manifestation of your ego, which is looking for the opportunity to self-satisfy, but only more skillfully, with guaranteed benefits. In this way, your egoism can be useful to you, because it is smart egoism that does not contradict either you or others. It may, of course, not always and not everywhere that understanding of other people is required; sometimes firmly defending one’s position is the most acceptable option, but in most cases understanding other people is necessary.

An assessment of your capabilities and the capabilities of your interlocutor must be objective; in each specific case, you must realistically assess your capabilities and the maximum that you can extract from them. But only you should know this information, your interlocutor should see your capabilities in a slightly more elevated version, just don’t go too far. But you need to know the capabilities of your interlocutor in their true form; the more obvious they are to you, the more opportunities you have. And in order to see these opportunities, you need to understand your interlocutor, hear him, get specifics, trust, and a sense of calm from him. The more he reveals himself to you, the more you will learn about him, and when you have all the cards in your hands, what prevents you from playing the game you want? So keep your egoism on a chain, let it work only within limited limits, without harming either you or your interests.

Why am I so stupid? Any person who finds himself in a new, unfamiliar situation can ask a similar question. Moreover, the level of education and the degree of reading do not play any role here. He simply does not know what to do, because he has not formed certain patterns of behavior.

It's not scary, but it does give you a lot to think about. To some extent, your own knowledge can even prevent you from feeling true self-confidence. A person who suffers from a lack of self-esteem often finds himself in a situation where he begins to doubt his own mental abilities and torments himself with the question: “What if I’m stupid?”

A person who is dissatisfied with his relationships with people around him, as a rule, begins to look for the truth within himself. In some cases, the search extends over several months or even years. In order to determine your true values, you need additional time. If you don’t push yourself and don’t rush to conclusions, you can restore peace of mind. The main thing is to be able to sort out your own feelings, to understand real reasons current events.

Signs of Dullness

By what criteria do we usually evaluate ourselves? After all, it often happens that we exaggerate our own shortcomings, constantly considering them to suit our own complexes. The habit of constantly monitoring your experiences can become entrenched over time and lead to unsatisfactory results. What do you mean, stupid person? Let's try to figure it out!

Inability to hear the interlocutor

Such a person is extremely inattentive to what is happening around him. He concentrates only on his own needs, and therefore tends not to notice people's reactions.

The inability to hear the interlocutor ultimately results in the fact that others begin to consider such a person not very distant. From the outside it seems that he is completely incapable of understanding the subject of the conversation, has no idea what is being discussed, that is, he is a prominent representative of stupid people. In fact, such a person is overly focused on his own experiences.

Poor learning ability

If a person has difficulty remembering any material, it is likely that he has a low memory capacity. At the same time, concentration will certainly suffer. Poor performance at school and beyond educational institutions usually creates a significant degree of self-doubt. And many young people ask: “What should I do if I’m stupid academically?” They consider it completely useless to learn something new and apply the acquired knowledge in practice. Extreme self-doubt gives rise to additional problems associated with communication and self-realization.

It becomes difficult for a person to concentrate on the task at hand. When thinking about the question “What should I do if I’m stupid and lazy,” one should be guided by individual approach. Each person is unique and has distinctive characteristics.

Reasons

In order for such a sense of self to form, good reasons are needed. It’s just that no one considers himself a complete nonentity. The feeling of worthlessness is dictated by the feeling of one’s own uselessness and the inability to somehow express oneself in society. Even once faced with misunderstanding, a person then expects ridicule throughout his life.

Insecure individuals tend to take too many things personally, even things that do not directly apply to them. So, what are the reasons why many people consider themselves stupid people? Let's take a closer look at them.

Habit of comparison

When a person feels stupid, in most cases conclusions are drawn based on comparing their own shortcomings with the strengths of others. And this is a big mistake! People cannot be the same and have an equal amount of knowledge in all areas. Almost everyone has the habit of comparing themselves with others. It comes from a lack of self-confidence. The more we soul-search, the more difficult it actually becomes to focus on everyday tasks.

When a person compares himself with others, he thereby admits his own weakness and takes away precious energy. This condition cannot lead to anything good, since it hinders development.

Lack of self-confidence

Only by fully realizing one's own prospects can a person move forward. Everyone has opportunities, but not everyone understands how to apply the knowledge they have in life. Lack of self-confidence actually blocks many undertakings and does not allow the personality to reveal itself. Thus, self-realization becomes impossible, since it is hampered by the strong fear of potential defeat that arises.

Each failure is experienced very hard, as if the happiness of a particular individual depends on it. "Why am I so stupid?" - a person constantly asks himself, asking himself numerous other questions about his inferiority. In most cases, he spends a long time looking for an opportunity to remake himself. This is because there is a fear of loneliness inside, coupled with the fear of not being up to par.

Self-doubt

Lack of self-confidence is another reason why a person may begin to consider himself a failure. It’s hardly surprising that he doesn’t understand much in life. If you constantly think about your own inadequacy, then you may never make progress in important matters and issues.

Self-doubt makes it very difficult to enjoy life, comprehend its boundaries and open new perspectives. It is impossible to achieve success if you constantly look back at yourself in search of answers to a wide variety of questions. You cannot oppress yourself with painful thoughts about your personal unfulfillment.

Psychological trauma

A traumatic situation is one of the most serious reasons that can undermine confidence in one’s own capabilities for a long time. It is very difficult for a person who is convinced of his impenetrable stupidity to begin to perceive himself in exactly the opposite way.

Psychological trauma and internal conflicts are a serious obstacle to feeling like a full-fledged person. The feeling of happiness depends on many factors, and it is always subjective.

When there is a conviction within that you cannot master the most basic skills, this creates an obstacle to the formation of a happy sense of self. It really seems to a person that he is not capable of anything. Such thoughts are destructive: they do not help in any way to cultivate self-confidence, but only convince a person of complete failure.

Interpersonal conflicts

Another reason why a person may consider himself narrow-minded is a feeling of resentment. It usually prevents us from adequately perceiving the surrounding reality. When some need in life is not satisfied, the individual develops internal deprivation. Sometimes a person does not understand what is happening to him because he has developed the habit of considering himself incapable of understanding the most ordinary things.

Existing conflicts with people often interfere with building normal harmonious relationships. Emotions such as fear, anger, and resentment largely inhibit personal development and prevent the emergence of a feeling of satisfaction. A person always needs to feel needed and involved in the lives of other people.

What to do

In order to get rid of the feeling of internal awkwardness, it is necessary to take certain actions. Without taking concrete steps, it is very difficult to free yourself from feelings of inferiority. What if I'm stupid? When asking such a question, you should be extremely frank with yourself. Having a set of clear steps, you can quickly get rid of the problem.

Working with self-esteem

Stop calling yourself stupid! It is very important to free yourself from the feeling of internal discomfort if you really want to start feeling differently.

There is no need to constantly torment yourself trying to cope with the existing problem. When a person calls himself stupid, he thereby admits his own weakness. Most likely, other people will begin to perceive it accordingly. However, it is worth remembering that a narrow-minded person will never think about his own shortcomings.

Developed reflection just means that a person is smart enough. It's just that some people don't know how to value themselves, find their strengths. You need to learn this! Working with self-esteem begins with accepting your individuality. It is impossible to achieve anything significant if you do not try for it.

Constant self-education

What if I'm stupid? This question usually comes to mind for those who suffer from low self-esteem. And to feel confident, you actually need to make significant efforts. The best thing to do would be to start educating yourself. Systematic exercises increase self-confidence and help release huge amounts of energy that can be used for useful purposes.

Self-education undoubtedly increases self-confidence. Thus, a person ceases to consider himself stupid and narrow-minded. Sometimes it will take a lot of effort to free yourself from the inner feeling of inferiority.

Taking responsibility

This is an important and necessary step in order to continue moving forward when your hands give up. Accepting responsibility means you need to stop complaining about life.

When we stop blaming others for what happens in our lives, visible changes begin. You must try to ensure that your self-confidence grows and strengthens every day. If this is not done, then the person will constantly feel his complete failure in anything and will not be able to start a new business without feeling guilty.

The feeling of one's own stupidity is a purely subjective feeling that you need to try to work with. You cannot get rid of the problem once and for all, because there is no magic pill, but you can work on yourself and change for the better.

Skill Development

What if I'm stupid? You must definitely try to improve your abilities. You can’t just stand still and not make any attempts to change yourself.

Developing communication skills contributes to overall productivity. Then any task will be within your reach and will bring moral satisfaction.

It is necessary to strive for a feeling of joy and spiritual fulfillment. The more we work on ourselves, the more prepared we become.

Thus, it is never too late to try to change something in your life. If a person feels quite insecure around other people due to lack of knowledge, this means that he needs to expand his inner vision. There is no need to dwell on the problem. You should always remember that there is a way out of any situation.

in, c

Question for a psychologist:

Hello. My question is this: why doesn’t my MCH, with whom we are just dating for now, understand that you can’t invite your friends to visit me? He doesn't understand the word "no" at all! My mother once told him: “Lesha, my apartment, this is my apartment!” I also have a lot of problems, no less than your friends, because I don’t run around the entrances!” (This was after Alexey invited his friend to our entrance, and before that he invited him to visit us, and his friend behaved extremely arrogantly). After this conversation, my MCH talked to his friend so that he would not behave arrogantly. Because he, thereby, disgraces him too. But here’s the problem: one day my mother went to see a friend, and I decided to invite Alexey to visit. Chat, discuss our affairs, our problems with women's health(I had them, and I decided to discuss them with him). I called him and invited him, saying that my mother had gone to visit a friend. Alexey then began to say that he would come to visit me with his friend. Not with the one who behaved impudently, but with someone else. Like, he's normal. “Since,” he says, “your mother is not there, then I will come with a friend. Do you want to see me? At the very least, have some tea and that’s it.” I tried to explain to Alexey that I wanted to be with him, that he was unlikely to agree to discuss his intimate problems in front of my friends if I invited them to visit him. But Alexey said that he would discuss it, and in general, “it’s all bullshit.” I had to lie to him that my mother’s friend invited me, the same one to whom my mother had previously gone. Of course, this was not true, Alexey realized this because he asked me to call this mother’s friend from the landline number. I called him in the evening, saying that I had just come from visiting. Of course, it was hardly worth lying, but I don’t understand how to explain to Alexey that he can’t invite his friends to our home? And why does he behave this way, doesn’t understand the word “no”?

Answer from theSolution psychologist:

Your MCH does not feel personal boundaries, and there may be several reasons for this.

Egocentrism and disrespect for loved ones

The first reason is egocentrism, in which he thinks in such a way that only his own needs are important. Other people's needs are unimportant, uninteresting, unworthy of attention, and even annoying. Egocentrism masks a deep disrespect for the needs, feelings and desires of other people.

Psychopaths do not sense other people's personal boundaries

Second possible reason violation of personal boundaries may be socially adapted psychopathy, or one of the varieties of personality disorders, as psychiatrists now call it. Personality disorders include about a dozen types of psychopathy and narcissism. Psychopathy and narcissism are comorbid diseases. The word comorbid means two different diseases in one person (co- joint, morbis - disease). These are signs of the fourth level of mental damage, according to the principle of the psychiatric funnel, explained in our article “System of psychopathological symptoms and syndromes.”

Bad upbringing and ignorance of etiquette

The third reason for behavior may be banal bad manners, ignorance of etiquette and what is called emotional dullness. Emotionally stupid is called not only schizophrenics who have lost the ability to appropriately express feelings, but also people who are not used to thinking what emotions will arise in their interlocutor after their phrases and actions.

Rudeness of feelings is a sign of an extremely low level of personality development

Typically, people with a low level of personality development do not understand hints, dissatisfied facial expressions, or gestures. But they understand rejection well, refusal to communicate. Your mistake is that you continue the interaction by emphasizing words rather than actions. If you didn’t open the door, didn’t come on a date, didn’t call back - these would be rude signals that would be accessible to the perception of the MC. Perhaps he would begin to guess that you are dissatisfied with something and maybe even think that he did something wrong. For you, this may seem like a rude action, on the verge of a complete break in the relationship, but people with undeveloped emotional sphere They don’t understand anything subtle. They simply don't see these signals.

Courses on developing emotional intelligence and restoring personal boundaries

When you see that a person clearly does not understand obvious things in psychology, and at the same time he is not a psychopath, then you see a low level of personal development. This is exactly how psychologists define deficiencies in personal development, by what a person does not understand. And having seen mistakes in the choice of reactions and methods of behavior, they recommend courses of psychotherapy. If your man does not suffer from a personality disorder, then a personal development course on the topic of personal boundaries and courses aimed at developing emotional intelligence. If he is a psychopath, then personal development courses are pointless, since psychopaths use psychological knowledge solely to manipulate loved ones to obtain free resources. All the best to you!

Are you in a difficult situation? life situation? Get a free and anonymous consultation with a psychologist on our website or ask your question in the comments.

Without claiming a high IQ score, I will give reliable facts (thanks to Bill Gates, long live the Internet and all Japanese in general) that there are dozens scientific theories laughter and with all their differences they all boil down to one thing: laughter lengthens life, developed sense humor help people defuse aggression (which is very important in our everyday life), relieves stress. From all that has been said, we can draw a logical conclusion that the lack of a sense of humor, a pessimistic attitude towards life as such “shortens, does not help, does not relieve, does not relieve,” etc.

A very interesting detail: according to statistics, a 5-year-old child laughs 300 times a day, and an adult laughs at least 20 times a day. Scientists directly attribute this to the fact that adults are less likely to find themselves in comical situations than children. To the question why children grow, but adults do not, Professor Lee Burke gave an amazing answer.

Experiments carried out on 16 volunteers showed: People waiting to watch a comedy movie had an 87 percent increase in growth hormone and produced a third more beta-endorphin compared to those who were going to read the latest newspaper news about politics and disasters.

And the hormone beta-endorphin has an analgesic effect on the body and helps fight depression, and growth hormone plays an important role in maintaining immunity.

Well, this is true, by the way, for the growth of those same IQ scores. And now directly about the humor.

Pranks and humor are very similar words in concept. Only, of course, you need to make a reservation that the prank should be sweet, harmless, not humiliating or insulting to a person. And, of course, the best day for all jokes is April 1st.

A talented prank is remembered for a long time and is often perceived by people as a reliable event.

This happened in the mid-80s. The following message was published in the Grozny Rabochiy newspaper. After finishing their tour in the republic, circus performers, when loading their props and animals into the carriages, forgot a cage with a hippopotamus on the platform.

And now the poor animal is toiling on the hot platform from thirst and hunger. The employees of the railway station called on the residents of Grozny to bring the hippo something to eat, and noted that, according to their observations, he really loves sprat in tomato. I simply could not remain indifferent to the troubles of our smaller brother. I went to the store, bought these canned goods and rushed to the platform... My only consolation was that I was far from alone. At first we all walked around the station looking for a cage with a hippopotamus, and when we realized that it was a prank, we all burst into uncontrollable laughter. And everyone laughed at themselves. It didn’t even occur to anyone to be indignant or complain. And these 5 minutes of laughter probably extended our lives by at least a year.

Self-irony, I must note, is a very useful thing, as it helps you approach life more simply and worry less about trifles and about your own complexes.

It cannot be said that if a person does not understand or does not perceive a joke, then he lacks a sense of humor, but sometimes one should use the imagination. They played it - I didn’t understand - I was offended. And there's clearly a feeling here self-esteem becomes a natural reaction of the body to the lack of its own sense of humor. A person with a complete lack of humor is in itself a humorous phenomenon.

You could even say that a sense of humor is an indicator mental health, but only if the feeling itself is healthy.

“Smile, gentlemen,” said the Baron, the same Munchausen

Remember our photojournalist Mussa Sadulaev’s joke about a tribe in Zimbabwe whose ancestors were Chechens. He filmed a representative of this tribe and he said a memorized phrase in Chechen language. This story was shown on republican television and the very next day in minibuses, in the market, and simply on the streets, people were discussing this “news”, and quite seriously. And only a few, it cannot be said in this case that skeptics, but people with a sense of humor, perceived this as an April Fool's joke and were right.

An American doctor from the University of Rochester Medical School was able to identify the part of the brain responsible for a sense of humor. According to the author of the discovery, Dina Shibata, the “laughter zone” is located in the lower parts of the frontal lobe. By the way, after microstrokes localized precisely in this area of ​​the head, a person may be completely deprived of the ability to understand jokes. And at the same time, those who like to laugh are less likely to suffer from cardiovascular diseases. Have you drawn any conclusions?

We can say that every person has a developed sense of humor as well as a sense of style. It can be given by nature and does not need to be developed. It may be in an embryonic state and needs to be “fed” a little and corrected. But here, as they say, the richer you are, the happier you are.

It can be so sad, especially at work, when everything is too serious. It’s good that in almost any team there is a person who is a joker by psychotype (there is not such a large percentage of them, by the way), and he brings relaxation to the atmosphere of general efficiency and seriousness... But no one specifically taught him this, and volumes with he didn’t study anecdotes... Impromptu and jokes are born on the tip of the tongue, and not painfully and in the gray matter of the brain... And this happens due to a person’s ability to put certain circumstances and facts into verbal form and present them in the form of a joke. Of course, this person must be observant and a bit of a psychologist, he must have a sensitive nature, even creative... Then we end up with a person with a sense of humor.

It's easier to move through life with a sense of humor - that's a fact. It is a pity that it is not transmitted with genes or by inheritance. But don’t despair - a sense of humor can be nurtured and developed. And the sooner you start this “education”, the better.

To paraphrase famous expression, we can say that a sense of humor helps to live. It promotes mental health: after all, those who know how to laugh at themselves are practically invulnerable.

It happens that a person is well-read, and smart, and interesting, but does not understand jokes at all. Any situation is extremely important for him. As a result, he is swimming in problems that, in fact, are not worth a damn.

In general, according to psychologists, of all the situations we find ourselves in in life, 95% of cases do not deserve to be taken seriously. However, many make a mountain out of a mountain. They lose self-confidence. Hence other complexes. And a complex person is a terrible thing. A witty person will not succumb to insults, will not allow negativity to take over him, and will not allow anyone to impose any kind of complex on him. After all, in his arsenal there is such a weapon as a joke. This best way extinguish other people's aggression and resolve the conflict.

In addition, humor (but kind, devoid of poisonous sarcasm) helps to assert oneself, establish and improve relationships between people, and also relieve stress.

It has long been noted that smart, developed, and imaginative people have an excellent sense of humor. Hence the conclusion - you need, first of all, to develop mentally, to grow intellectually: read books (both funny and serious), communicate more with witty people, make new acquaintances, develop imagination and positive thinking, improvise.

And remember: a sense of humor is a big plus for your attractiveness. After all, humor is laughter, and laughter, as we know, is the best medicine. Lack of a sense of humor, although a diagnosis, is not a death sentence. So, heal yourself, friends, heal yourself with humor!