It is useful to know: is it possible to get married without registering at the registry office - rules and exceptions. Wedding When they get married before or after the wedding

In the modern world, there is nothing strange in the fact that two loving people live together in a civil marriage or simply live without thinking about it.

Actual orders

But still there are people who have their own moral principles and follow the rules established many, many years ago. One of these rules is the wedding in the church. It is believed that you need to "legitimize" your marriage not only before the people and the Law of the state in which the couple lives, but also before the Lord. A marriage that is blessed by God is more likely to last. Those couples who intend to get married in the church must definitely find a place and a priest, with whom, in joy and in sorrow, they can find answers to their questions.

wedding rules

In order to get married, you need to know a lot of things. For example, when you can get married, since 4 fasts are observed in a year, they don’t get married in them, and Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday should also be excluded.

The choice of a church is also important for the couple to feel comfortable spiritually in it. For the wedding, you need to prepare icons, scarves, towels. As witnesses, it is better to take a strong married couple who would have a good relationship with the young.

Wedding without registration

Some young people want to get married in order to live the fleshly life, because without marriage in the church it is considered a sin. But many people do not know whether it is possible to get married before marriage or not. But there is no definite answer to this question. In fact, before the wedding, many ask to see a marriage certificate, since the church observes all orders and supports state laws. But it all depends on the church and the church rector, to whom the couple turned.

And if you follow the church foundations and orders, then it is better to get married before the wedding, that is, before registering with the registry office, because a wedding is also a wedding. The bride must be in a white dress, which indicates her virginity.

If young people want to get married, but they do not have a marriage registration, then you need to contact the rector of the church with this question.

Yana Volkova

The wedding ritual for a believing Christian couple is a very responsible, but at the same time, quite natural process. Especially if the bride and groom grew up in families where Orthodox traditions were honored from birth. But people come to God at different ages. And not everyone is familiar with the rules in the big deal of getting married in heaven. How to choose the best time for a wedding? When the church can categorically refuse in the conduct of the ceremony, or vice versa, recommends the ceremony As soon as possible?

Orthodox wedding calendar in the church: a good Monday for a church wedding and a "forbidden" Saturday

Before deciding which day it is best for newlyweds to get married in a church, it is worth note other equally important things:

  1. Temple. Its history, location, recommendations and reviews.
  2. Priest. Many newlyweds, following the traditions of their family, choose their abbot long before marriage. But if it didn’t work out, then give preference to the priest, based on the recommendations and personal impressions of communication.

May is considered the most unfavorable month for a wedding. Traditionally, this time was the most difficult for work in the garden and in the field. And autumn stocks were very scarce after winter, which made the festive table completely poor. In the modern world, when such prejudice is considered a relic of the past, May remains among the leaders of the most beautiful months of the year: renewed nature, fresh greenery and blooming gardens will create a wonderful background for the celebration. And the church does not interfere with the wedding in May at all.

As for the special days of the week, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday and even Monday are considered the most successful for a wedding. But on Saturday, such a ceremony can be held only in case of a special agreement with the priest. This day of the week is considered the day of commemoration of the dead, and the church asks the newlyweds to refrain from church weddings. Couples are still not allowed to get married on Tuesdays and Thursdays throughout the year.

The most successful time of the year for the wedding ceremony people determine the first Sunday after Easter

On the day of Krasnaya Gorka, priests hold a large number of weddings for everyone. In addition, any weddings on holidays, associated with the Virgin Mary, especially the Protection of the Most Holy Theotokos, are considered the key to a successful marriage and happiness in the family.

Priests do not crown newlyweds during fasts, on days of continuous weeks and on the eve of major Orthodox holidays. And each church has its own patronal temple holidays, which do not fall into the general church calendar and which are not suitable for church marriages.

Orthodox church calendar of weddings - the lifesaver of the bride and groom

And this means that the consultation of a particular priest in a particular church is extremely necessary. He'll be happy to help you choose. right day to get married.

Is it possible to get married without registering marriage in the registry office?

For truly believing couples, a wedding, as a process, is much more significant than a registered state marriage. Many come to church and ask to perform the ceremony without first signing at the registry office. Like, no value they have no marriage certificate, but only God's blessing. But do people get married in church without a “stamp in their passport”?

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From the point of view of Orthodox rules, whether there was a state registration of marriage before or after the ceremony is not important. The rules of the church do not prohibit getting married first, and then signing. But a clergyman cannot document whether any of the couple is hiding a real marriage to another person.

The priest will agree to marry without painting only the couple that he knows well from birth, trusts their feelings and is ready to take responsibility for the family life of the newlyweds

Such friendly relations between the priest and the bride and groom are very rare. That's why they ask first register relations in the registry office so that civil servants can prevent possible bigamy. And after receiving a marriage certificate, a wedding ceremony is held.

Should the wedding be before or after the wedding? How late can you get married

The most common case when the wedding ceremony takes place on the wedding day. In the morning, the couple goes to the Wedding Palace, goes through the registration procedure there, receives a certificate in their hands and hurries to the church to get married. And although this saves a lot of time and money for the newlyweds, their emotional burden on the wedding day doubles. After all, you have to be nervous about the sacrament of the Church, too.

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Sep 25, 2018 at 3:35 AM PDT

It happens that newlyweds prefer to get married in a secluded setting without prying eyes and pathos. On the wedding day, this is unlikely to be done, since all attention is riveted to the bride and groom everywhere. But often a couple is simply not sure whether it is possible to undergo a wedding ceremony after the wedding. Priests to the question “How many days, months or years after the wedding can I come to church for a wedding?” The answer is very simple: if newlyweds ready to legalize their marriage before God, they can do it at any time after official registration with the registry office.

Wedding in the church for already married couples - a ceremony after checking feelings by everyday life

Priests are increasingly encouraging the desire of young people to get married only a few years after the official wedding. In this case, the husband and wife approach church marriage in a more balanced and confident manner.

The past years only strengthen their love and loyalty to each other.

For church rules, in fact, it doesn’t matter how many years a couple has been living together in the status of husband and wife - if they come even after a year, even after 10 years. And the ceremony itself, carried out after several years of marriage, is absolutely no different in significance from the ceremony that would be held on the wedding day.

How to get married in a church for people of age? Rite for the "newlyweds" in retirement

If we talk about age restrictions, it used to be argued that women who have reached 60 year old age and men after 70 years old. The priests explained this by the fact that one of the main goals of marriage is the birth and upbringing of children. And women and men after a certain age are no longer able to perform this function to the full (although older stories are also known). But now the church has become more loyal to people of age who have decided to register their marriage in heaven. AT wedding prayer the priest simply omits the words about the children and performs the ceremony.

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Reasons preventing the wedding: when is it possible and not? Is there a church marriage after 3 civil marriages?

The Orthodox Church in the wedding process tries to observe a lot of important and necessary procedures. For example, without confession and communion, it is almost impossible for a couple to go through a wedding ceremony. And although the church is loyal to those who turn to her for help and advice, a wedding, as a confirmation of marriage in heaven, is not allowed for everyone. A couple may be denied if:

  • Both the groom and the bride turned out to be priests.
  • One of the couple is in another undissolved marriage (civil or church).
  • Young are relatives (up to the 3rd generation inclusive).
  • Belonging of one of the couple to another faith or to atheistic teaching.
  • The husband or wife has already had 3 or more marriages.

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It is also not allowed to undergo a wedding ceremony for unbaptized people.

In addition, if all ages are submissive to love, then such things will not work with church marriage. And if too young partners are interested in the question of how old they can get married in a church, then the couple is underage for sure can forget about the wedding sacrament.

A lot of young ladies are worried about the ban on weddings during menstruation. After all, it often happens to hear that you can’t even just go to church and touch the icons on those very notorious critical days. But to great joy, many priests are already accepting the explanations of their colleagues, who call for more humbleness towards the sinfulness of the female lunar cycle.

And no matter how guilty Eve was in the past, the road to the temple is more and more often open to modern women on any day of the month.

Advanced priests argue that modern hygiene products simply will not allow sinful blood to get on the church floor when menstruation occurs on the wedding day. But anyway, it's better clarify the loyalty of your priest. And in case of refusal to transfer the sacrament to another day.

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It is also unlikely that a Catholic and Orthodox will get married. For such purposes, special permission is required both from one side and the other. And it is given extremely rarely, although does not involve a change of faith for a Catholic. There were cases when a wedding in the Orthodox Church was allowed, but only on the condition that children born in such a marriage accept the Orthodox faith. But it is forbidden to get married in the Orthodox Church in the Catholic Church.

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Is it possible to get married a second time?

Couples go to church to get married with the firm intention of living their "happily ever after" with their partner, confident in their feelings and attitude towards each other. But life is unpredictable. Divorces happen even more often than we would like. What does the church say in the case when feelings faded, the marriage was dissolved and the choice of the former husband and wife fell on other people? Is it possible to repeat the wedding ceremony?

For believing couples, it is important that their marriage is legal not only before the law, but also before the face of God. And in order for it to become so, it is necessary to go through the wedding procedure in the Orthodox Church, observing all the rules. The www.site has prepared an article about them so that you can understand all the intricacies of this sacred rite and know what you need for a wedding in the church and how to prepare for it.

Wedding rules: who can and who cannot get married

The first thing you need to know before getting married in the Orthodox Church is the conditions for admission to the ceremony, because. there are some restrictions. The church will not marry a couple if the bride and groom:

  • are related by blood up to the fourth generation (brothers and sisters, cousins, second cousins, etc.);
  • are relatives in a direct line (father and daughter, mother and son), this also applies to adopted children and parents;
  • are half-brother and sister by mother or father;
  • are in clergy (male) or monastic (female);
  • changed gender.

In addition, the question often arises of what is needed for a church wedding if one of the couple or both have already been married to others. You need to get an official certificate of divorce. But keep in mind, if the current marriage is the fourth in a row, then they will still not be allowed to get married, the church recognizes only three marriages.


There are also cases in which a wedding in a church is allowed only with the permission of the bishop (a person with the highest spiritual rank):

  • If the bride or groom is already married to other people. To dissolve such a marriage, you will need the permission of the bishop, as well as his consent to a second wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church.
  • If the future spouses have a big age difference or one of them is a minor.
  • If one of the newlyweds is incapacitated or has serious mental illness.
  • If the husband and wife are spiritual relatives (godparents of one child, godparents and godchildren).
  • If a couple wants to get married before signing at the registry office. This is possible in exceptional cases, for example, if one of the couple is seriously ill or is forced to leave soon for places of military operations.

In addition, it is allowed to get married if the husband or wife professes other Christian religions, for example, Catholicism. But only on condition that the children will be brought up in the Orthodox faith. And this must be documented, namely the written consent of an official representative of another religion.


What do you need to get married in a church?

Now that we have figured out what circumstances can become an obstacle to this sacred ceremony, let's talk about what it takes to get married in a church.

To do this, both spouses must be Orthodox Christians and be baptized. If the last requirement is absent, then it is necessary to undergo a rite of baptism before the wedding.

Another condition is that the couple must be officially married. A marriage certificate will need to be presented. The age at which you can take a wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church corresponds to the legislative - 18 years. We have already discussed the exceptions above.


Everything about the wedding: from choosing a date to accessories

After you have made sure that there are no obstacles to the ceremony, you need to start preparing for the sacrament of the wedding. It also has its own set of principles that must be followed. But let's start with the date. It is with the choice of the number that the whole procedure begins.

According to the rules, a wedding in a church cannot be held:

  • on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, as well as August 29 and September 11 (the days of the Beheading of John the Baptist), September 14 and 27 (the days of the Exaltation of the Cross of the Lord);
  • during weeks and great fasts,
  • from the Nativity of Christ to the Epiphany.

All these days are marked in the church calendar, so it will not be difficult to estimate the date yourself. However, before making a final decision, you should first consult with the priest.

Important: the bride should make sure that her period does not fall on the wedding day. During this period, girls are forbidden to take part in any sacraments.


wedding dress

If the groom can afford to come to the wedding in any classic suit, then more stringent requirements are imposed on the image of the bride:

  • Her dress must be white and closed. Shoulders, back and neckline should be covered. An excellent option would be a lace dress with sleeves and a collar. It meets all the rules, but allows you to look feminine and romantic.
  • The bride should have her head covered with a scarf or veil, preferably a short one, so that she does not accidentally get dirty with a candle.
  • Shoes should be simple and without high heels. But this is a plus, since you have to spend on your feet almost motionless for at least an hour.


What to bring?

To conduct the sacrament, you need to buy a few things that are better to immediately add to the shopping list for the wedding:

  1. Wedding rings (wedding rings are suitable).
  2. Big candles.
  3. White towel or towel.
  4. Four white handkerchiefs (to hold crowns and candles).
  5. Icons of the Savior and the Virgin (if your parents have them, then you can take them, then they will also be a symbol of parental blessing).

Also, the newlyweds and all guests must wear pectoral crosses.


What needs to be done before the ceremony?

According to the rules of preparation before the wedding ceremony, young people need to take communion and confess. And also one of the main rituals of preparation for the upcoming sacrament is fasting, which lasts until communion and, therefore, the wedding itself, since communion along with confession is held either the day before or in the morning on the day of the ceremony.

Fasting implies abstinence, fasting and attending all services for at least one week, as well as holding home prayers as directed by the prayer book.


Wedding of newlyweds in Orthodoxy: how does the sacrament go?

It is worth knowing how the wedding procedure goes before it begins. So you will know what to prepare for and what to do during the sacrament. The ceremony itself consists of two stages: the engagement and the wedding itself.


betrothal

For the betrothal, the spouses stand facing the altar: the groom on the right, the bride on the left. Guests sit behind them. The priest gives lighted candles into the hands of the young, blessing them before that. They are baptized with these candles. It is believed that if they did not go out during the entire ceremony, then a happy and long life awaits the young.

The priest then says prayers and betrothes the couple with consecrated rings. By the way, they need to be brought to the church in advance for lighting.

After the exchange of rings, the couple should go to the middle of the hall and, standing in front of the lectern on a towel, confirm that they are marrying of their own free will.


The wedding itself begins with the prayers of the priest, after which he places crowns on the heads of the bride and groom (they are later held by witnesses). Then the priest reads the prayers again and after the "Our Father" gives the newlyweds to drink wine from the goblet. Everyone should take three sips.

This is followed by a procession around the lectern, before which the priest joins the hands of the newlyweds, thus marking the beginning of their joint journey. Then the clergyman removes the crowns and gives the bride and groom to kiss the icons of the Savior and the Virgin, as well as the cross, in turn. After that, he gives the young icons and utters a parting word. According to tradition, icons and a towel are kept in the family for life.

This is such a complex, but very significant and symbolic wedding ceremony. Portal Svadbagolik.ru hopes that it has helped you learn how to get married in a church. And may your sacrament pass without any difficulties and be remembered as one of the happiest events in life.

Orthodox traditions, forgotten in the atheistic Soviet years, are gradually returning to our lives and, of course, cannot ignore such an important event as marriage. A wedding is being chosen by more and more couples - some because of their own deep faith, someone - to please their parents, or simply out of a desire for something special and sacred. And sometimes a husband and wife, who have been living together for many years, decide to conduct the sacrament.

The wedding symbolically means the unity of Christ in the form of the groom and the Orthodox Church in the form of the bride. The sacrament is a mutual vow of love and fidelity. After the exchange of rings and solemn service, the bride and groom are considered spouses in the eyes of God, an indestructible spiritual bond is formed between them, and the new family receives a blessing for a happy life and the birth of children. It is worth remembering that - forever, and the dethronement ceremony does not exist.

Peculiarity! Of course, the church goes towards the weak human nature, and allows remarriage, but only after penance, confession, and also no more than three times in a lifetime. Civil unregistered marriage is also considered.

What is the best time after marriage?

There is no single answer to this question. It is worth giving a serious oath only when you feel that you are ready for this. You must be sure that you will live with your chosen one all your life, accepting his minuses and weaknesses, pride and mistakes. The union consecrated by the church is a spiritual unity, a joint path to God, requiring inner maturity, wisdom, and tolerance.


According to the canons, a wedding is allowed both on the day of registration of a marriage, and after a month, a year, ten years - at any time when the realization of readiness for a responsible step comes.

If you want to become spouses before the state and before God on the same day, you should carefully plan the time of both celebrations. Usually, it is still recommended to space the two ceremonies in time, as young people and guests can get tired of so many impressions.

As for the upper limit, there is none. It is possible to seal the union with spiritual bonds even after fifty years of marriage - and in this case it will definitely be a balanced and unchanging decision.

Training

Wedding is possible only for newlyweds who have already formalized their relationship legally(Exceptions are possible, but very rare). So, strictly speaking, any couple will get married after the wedding, the only question is how long their family life lasted.


If you have recently got married, and the bride is innocent, then there are no special requirements. In case your family has already existed for some time, there are some nuances:

  • According to the rules of the church Only a virgin can wear a veil, the wife, who has already known her husband, should cover her head with a light scarf (nothing, however, prevents her from decorating it with lace or making it from translucent fabric);
  • If the bride is not getting married for the first time, then the dress should be chosen not snow-white, but any other light shade;
  • Brides of age are recommended to choose a cream, pastel, golden dress even if her marriage is her first and only;
  • Married couples need to remember that fast three days before the ceremony- do not eat animal food, tune in to spiritual purification and rebirth, and also avoid intimate relationships;
  • A woman's pregnancy is not a hindrance to a wedding, but on critical days it is strictly forbidden to visit the church so check your calendar.

Rules

Any church sacrament has certain requirements that must be observed. So, it must be chaste, covering the neckline, knees, shoulders, arms (at least to the elbows). Pantsuits, dark or bright colors are not allowed.

Refrain from large frilly jewelry and bright cosmetics, pay special attention to the absence of lipstick, because you have to kiss the cross.

The sacrament is not performed on the days of fasting or the dates of major church holidays. Wedding is not possible on Tuesday, Thursday or Saturday, because then the first wedding night falls on a fast day.

Important! If your passport contains a name that differs from the name received at baptism, warn the priest about this in advance. During the sacrament, it will be necessary to use the second name given before God.

Both newlyweds must be baptized Orthodox(Christians of other denominations are allowed with reservations) who are not blood or spiritual relatives of each other, and also not bound by other marriage vows.


In the event of a second wedding, it is necessary to obtain permission from the bishop to dissolve the previous marriage, as well as to enter into a new one. In addition, if the previous marriage was dissolved through the fault of the newlywed, then one should repent and fulfill the assigned penance.

The minimum age of the bride is 16, the groom is 18. The maximum age is limited to 60 for a woman and 70 for a man, but this rule is not strictly enforced. For a couple who have lived a long life in a secular marriage, they are likely to make an exception and get married, even if one or both spouses are already in old age.

Attributes

  • . They should be as simple as possible, without complex decor or large stones. If you follow all the rules, then the bride should choose silver, and the groom - gold;
  • : Savior for the groom, Our Lady for the bride, best of all - inherited as a gift from parents;
  • White or pink towel, large enough to fit the newlyweds standing on it;
  • Pectoral crosses- should be both for those entering into marriage, and for all guests of the sacrament;
  • wedding candles, which can be purchased at the church shop, and white handkerchiefs with which you will hold them;
  • Red wine(cahors);
  • Freshly baked bread- donated to the church.

rite

The sacrament itself takes about an hour and begins with the betrothal. The priest takes the young people to the church, showing by the fact that before God they are now a single whole. Wedding candles are lit, prayers are read to those entering into marriage and censing is carried out. At the end, the priest puts on the rings consecrated on the throne, and the husband and wife exchange them three times, confirming their intention to be together forever.

Important! On the day of the wedding, the couple must come to the beginning of the service, while from 12 at night it is forbidden to eat, drink alcohol and smoke.

Then the sacrament of the wedding begins. Its main part is an expression of consent to take each other as a wife before the world and God. Prayers are offered for the blessing of marriage, family happiness, spiritual purity and future children. The newlyweds are baptized with a crown, while the wife is applied to the icon of the Virgin, and the husband to the face of the Savior.


Then the priest pronounces the solemn “Lord, our God, crown them with glory and honor!”, after which he gives the young a cup of red wine - a symbol of joy. First, the husband should sip Cahors, and then the wife. The couple circles around the lectern three times, after which they are considered spouses in the eyes of the church.

Useful video

A wedding is a very beautiful and serious sacrament. Someone gets married a day after the wedding, someone who has lived with his spouse for many years. About it in the video:

Conclusion

Marriage is the most sincere and comprehensive oath of allegiance, which can give each other loving people. The sacrament binds two souls for life with inseparable spiritual bonds. That is why the wedding of people who have already been married, who know each other and are confident in their love, is accepted and blessed by the church even more favorably than the ceremony for a young innocent couple.